ambition

I can’t believe I’ve gone 4 months without a new entry. That’s nuts. It doesn’t feel as if that much time has passed but there it is, clear as can be.

I’m really starting to learn a lesson in what kind of results can be achieved by applying a consistent effort over time. Whether they’re good habits or bad, consistency always seems to bring about more of the same. If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got. I’ve been wishing and hoping for things to progress in a more substantial way than they have been in the last few months, to no avail. I didn’t understand it. It seemed as if the universe was working against me however, today gave me some new insight. The reality was that even though I was clear in my head about what I wanted, my actions didn’t really reflect that. On top of that I wasn’t putting as much effort as I knew I could into my intention and application of things. I wonder now if I had done that 4 months ago, what kind of results I might have achieved today? It’s never too late to start making a change for the better. Although it will take time, persistence every single day is what is going to bring about lasting change and results. If I just keep doing what I have been doing, nothing is going to change. At least not for a long time (and I don’t think I’m willing to wait that long).

I’ve learned nothing is generally achieved without sacrifice and so with that in mind, it’s becoming clearer that is what I have to be prepared for. Not only do I need to have the willingness to make sacrifices but I also need to have the strength to persevere past them and into the glorious outcome I am striving towards. I have to believe that one day all my pain, suffering hard work and sacrifice are going to be justified by the place in life I arrive at. At the same time I know I’m not going to get there by simply wishing and waiting for it to happen. I’ve spent my whole life wishing. I’ve spent my whole life waiting and honestly, I’m so sick of waiting and wanting but never moving forward, never accomplishing, achieving or progressing on the level that I know I can. Sometimes life seems as if it designed to keep you limited and suppressed but even though it feels and seems that way the vast majority of the time, I can’t accept that as truth and so no matter how opposing this idea seems, I will double my efforts and continue to move forward with more determination and tenacity than I’ve ever had before. If you want it bad enough, then get it. I want it bad and I’m going to get it.

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